The information provided in The Kinder Way Podcast is for educational purposes only, and is not intended as a substitute for professional advice from a licensed advisor. The content of each episode is the opinion of the host and interviewees, and does not represent the views of Serenia Life Financial or any of its other subsidiaries or affiliates. Please always consult a licensed insurance advisor for guidance. Serenia Life Financial does not endorse any third-party views referenced in this content.

“How would you feel if you were faced with the unexpected passing of your partner with a baby on the way?”

Our latest episode of The Kinder Way Podcast finds our host having a a mom to (almost) mom chat with a colleague who is: (a) expecting a baby, and (b) not from Canada. The conversation gets serious as our soon-to-be mom imagines her life in this country with a new baby… without her husband in it. They also chat about what goes into selecting a guardian for your child when you’re from far away and/or much of your family lives far away. Tune in for some real talk between a mom and mom-to-be…

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Episode Transcript

Kathleen
In today’s episode, I’m happy to have my talented colleague Teresa Moscardo join me for a mom to almost mom chat. Teresa is the marketing coordinator here at Serenia Life, and she’s also the amazing editor of the Kinder Way podcast. Originally from Mexico, Teresa has been living in Waterloo with her husband Luis and their adorable dog Nacho for four years now.

Before we get started, I should note that we are both speaking from personal experience and that this episode should not be taken as advice for your unique situation. Alright, let’s do this.

So I know you’re soon to welcome a baby boy right? So exciting. I imagine it must be a little bit stressful having a baby in another country, but you’re lucky your mom is coming to join you for the first couple months.

Teresa
Yeah, we are super excited. It’s definitely starting to feel real.

Kathleen
Aw, amazing. Okay, now on to the tough questions. As newcomers to Canada with a baby on the way, how would you feel if you were faced with the unexpected passing of your partner, I know not not a happy thought without life insurance to cover the costs of raising a baby on your own or potentially heading back to Mexico.

Teresa
I think I will feel lost at first because I mean I’ve experienced loss before but never from someone so close to me. So losing someone so someone really really close and then we’re building a family and all of that I think will be super hard. And especially with a newborn or even if it’s years later, a a small kid,

Plus, to to be honest with you, I think I don’t know if I will be able to continue the Canadian dream. Probably I’ll return home just to have the support of loved ones and family and be close to home. Because right now what it’s making home here is this family, right? My husband, that we’re welcoming our baby boy, all of that is what’s what’s making family here,

But going back even if you go back to your country, You’re going back to rebuild from scratch again. So when we came to Canada, we had financial security because we had savings and we were building stuff. So going back with the financial responsibility without any type of insurance or any type of money, I think will be really, really tough.

Kathleen
Well, let’s flip that scenario now. So what if you and your husband did have life insurance, but you were faced with the same heartbreaking situation? Would anything change? Like how would you feel in that case if now you have a lump sum of money to help with the cost of either staying in Canada or heading back home?

Teresa
I think probably the decision would be the same, maybe going back because money is not everything, right? It’s just a really good tool, but at least would give me time to breathe. Because it’s like, okay, maybe I can pay my rent for a couple of more months and try to move everything and transfer my documents and close my accounts…

And maybe if I have the money, I will invite my mom or my husband’s parents to visit me and help me around with all the things that we need to complete here before going back.

Because it’s not just like taking, you know, one suitcase and going back. We also have financial responsibilities here. And then having something to start again there. I think that’s super helpful. It’s definitely won’t change the loss or all the these things that we’re experiencing, but at least we’ll give space to think.

This is space to not just keep acting and acting and acting, you know, trying to to get all the immediate expenses solved. So yes, I think yeah, I think it’s a bit more positive and I imagine that those are the scenarios that we imagine when we are thinking about, maybe I should get life insurance for the ‘what ifs’, right?

Kathleen
Yeah, exactly. And it it’s like you said, it’s nice to have the choice, right? When you have that financial support, then you can make choices versus just acting because you have no other choice and you have to do the cheapest option, right?

Teresa
Yeah, you have to do what with it to get done and that’s it, yes.

Kathleen
Yeah. So let’s talk about your baby prep. I know you guys are in the middle of well, I think you said you’re you’re recently done the nursery and the crib and all that stuff.

Teresa
Yeah.

Kathleen
So amidst all of that baby prep, do you and Luis ever have like the less fun talks about planning, like estate planning, who would be your baby’s guardian in, let’s say, the very unlikely event you were to both pass away. Unlikely, right? But do you… have you had that conversation?

Teresa
Yes. it’s weird because you don’t want to have those conversations, but I think it’s pretty important. we’re talking about like getting in place our ills and the the conversation of what if we’re not here? That’s really sad.

Kathleen
Yeah.

Teresa
So either case we’d love Louise’s sister to maybe take care of our baby. I hope that by the time this podcast is aired we already had a conversation with her and that she’s okay. But right now that that’s part of our thought. And it’s, in our case, it’s based on that we really love family and we believe that this person is the correct one in moral value, ethical value, in the love that she has for the family, plus also the resources that she’s having in terms not not only the financial ones – because I know she can buy a flight to Canada – but also the emotional resources that she has. The skills of learning the language and being comfortable speaking in English too. Because probably if a we asked another person, like my mom, for example, she’s not that comfortable speaking in English. It’s not like I can put her in front of a legal situation to solve. So so I think yes. It’s more those skills that you need to take into account. Okay, someone that can actually talk to our insurance company, for example. It’s really hard having those conversations because I think you could you start maybe with just the thought of “I really like this person,” and then you need to go deeper in the ‘what ifs,’ right?

So yes I really think that any newcomer in Canada, or even if you’re already established here but the majority of your family is living abroad, you should have that conversation

Kathleen
Yeah. I mean I’m in that situation and I’m Canadian born, right? I’m married to an Irish guy. My in-laws are all in Ireland, so we had to – that took us a long time to kind of firm up that decision and say, “Would we send him overseas if both of us were to pass versus, you know, a friend of mine that I’ve known forever?”

And eventually we went with family, but I’m s I’m still not a hundred percent okay with that because I’m like, that’s a lot for a child to move countries when they’ve just lost both their parents and yeah, it’s definitely not an easy decision.

Teresa
No. And I think probably also can change. So I think something you need to keep revisiting every now and then. Because life changes a lot in such a small amount of time.

Kathleen
So true.

Okay. Final question. Have you, as a soon to be new mom, considered getting life insurance for your baby? And if so or if not, why?

Teresa
So in the past, I wasn’t even thinking about life insurance for kids. But now that I’m learning more, I think it’s a really great tool that you can connect with other types of investments for the future of your kid.

And I will definitely buy life insurance for him when he’s here because I think it’s such a small amount of money. Sometimes we believe that it will be crazy, crazy, crazy expensive. And not really. Sometimes it could be maybe your latte of the week, you know, instead of instead of buying two lattes, you have one latte and life insurance for your kids… and it’s an investment that keeps growing.

But I think it’s part of that magic, that sometimes people are thinking about life insurance in terms of death, like a lump sum amount that you could use if someone passes away. But for kids it’s the total opposite. It’s like a lump sum amount of course when they pass away in a long, long, long, long, long time for legacy, but the part that they can actually use to fulfill those dreams or to have that small net.

So yeah, I love to dream. So and of course now that having a baby I’m dreaming even more. So yes, I think it’s not about expectations but having the dream of “Okay, there is something here and I can provide you that it’s different. And you can you will be able to take at the time you’re ready.”

Kathleen
Yeah…  I think people yeah, actually don’t realize that, right? They hear life insurance, they think you only get the money after you die. But with a kid, over time as that investment component grows, they have access now to like a good chunk of money when they really need it, right?

Teresa
Yeah.

Kathleen
Okay, so let’s say you buy life insurance for your new baby. How would you feel if your insurer gave you a $100 baby bonus within his first year of life?

Teresa
Because I think it’s like thinking about okay, we are not only securing or those dreams for our baby. We’re not only having that investment component, we are also having hundred dollars back. That’s great. At least for the first year, that’s like, I don’t know, probably two or three small breakfasts in a cafe. Or maybe diapers, you know…

Kathleen
There’s gonna be a lot of diapers bought in the next year!

Teresa
Yeah. Every dollar counts and having hundred dollars back is a really good benefit, a good thing to have.

Kathleen
So there you go. You can’t beat a little kindness.

And it goes to show when done right, insurance can be both human and kind.

Speaking of insurance, I’m ending this episode with an important disclaimer. When you heard me mention the investment component, I was referring to the cash value of a participating whole life policy, which will generally be reduced if you choose to access it via a withdrawal, policy loan, or surrender. If the policy loan isn’t paid back, the outstanding balance and interest will be subtracted from the death benefit, decreasing that final payout.